Behavior Changes

[rmthunter]

By way of update, in the past year I have lost both Denver and Millie, Denver to some kind of toxic shock from unidentifed sources, Millie to intestinal cancer.

Ben is incredibly healthy and lively at 16, and while always an affectionate cat, has become extraordinarily demanding, and I'm wondering if anyone has had similar experiences.

I may have to get another pet, just in self defense, although right now, considering the circumstances, I'm very reluctant to do that.

Bob

[lynnzop[$]]

Oh Bob, I'm so sorry about your losing Denver and Millie.

Yes, we used to have multiple cats and lost all but one. He's quite the pest any more....you might try introducing Ben to a new friend, if it's a kitten he might be annoyed by it, but then again he might "adopt" it as his new buddy.

Good luck and hugs!

Lynn

[murasaki]

I'm so sorry to hear about Denver and Millie.

I think cats need other cats as companions (or dogs if no cats are available); that notwithstanding, the demi-goddesses get very clingy if I leave them for more than a few days, once they get over being mad, that is. So, I would expect Ben to crave attention but I think you could alleviate that need somewhat by introducing another cat. I do suggest getting a cat of the opposite gender, kitten or no. Bringing in a cat of the same gender seems to lead to more territorial issues than bringing in the opposite gender.

[theworm[$]]

This may not be helpful. I have two cats from the same litter - a male and a female. I just brought in cat #3. Another male. He and my male kittie seem to be getting along ok. My female has resorted to hiding under the bed and growling quite fiercly. They are all about 9 years old. Maybe they're too set in their ways.
In any case, I'm sorry that you lost two this year, and I hope Ben adjusts.

[eris esoteric]

I can mail you Stranger, if you like.

Love, Pixie.

[rmthunter]

eris esoteric said

I can mail you Stranger, if you like.

Love, Pixie.

Thank you kindly, but Ben has gotten strange enough.

Losing the other two was kind of horrendous -- with Denver, thankfully, it was scary but very fast -- less than a day. With Millie, it was heartbreaking, particularly because until the very end she was sweet and lovable, as she had always been --even more so, if that was possible: Millie loved everyone. When she was finally too weak to get up into my lap on her own -- which was not so long after we had finally figured out what the problem was -- I made the hard decision. The vet broached the possibility of surgery, but quite aside from the expense, she was down to 3 1/2 pounds and simply would not have survived. And there was no way to build her up -- she could no longer eat.

(Just sitting here writing this, I'm remembering having gone through the same thing with friends, but not in my living room. Life has too many parallels, sometimes.)

At any rate, don't mean to unload, I just want to thank you all for your kind words, very sincerely,

Bob

[eris esoteric]

I don't mind. Pain is pain, and sometimes you need to let it out. I'm here.

[theworm[$]]

Those of us who have lost pets totally understand.

[mjfrombuffalo[$]]

I think you should get another cat, Ben probably needs the company and stimulation that another furry friend will provide. Hubby and I are thinking about getting another cat when we move so that if Buffy or Astro dies (which is never going to happen, BTW), the surviving cat will still have a "sibling." But of course it's never going to be necessary. Ever.

[rmthunter]

I know, and it's always been my practice in the past to have two (I know, I had three, but there's a story there -- Millie was supposed to have been my ex's, but I refused to part with her). I just don't know if I'm up to the strain of the introductory period right now.

I don't think I am.

Bob

[mjfrombuffalo[$]]

I certainly know that feeling. Here I posted what I did 11/9, and when Hubby yesterday made reference to it possibly being Buffy's time and that when he's gone, will go get a kitten, I wanted to sock him in the mouth. :/

[theworm[$]]

OFF TOPIC


Hey Bob! Go make some room in your PM box.

[rmthunter]

theworm said

OFF TOPIC


Hey Bob! Go make some room in your PM box.

Yeah, I just got the inbox full message.

[nicholmere]

rmthunter said

-- Millie was supposed to have been my ex's, but I refused to part with her).

Always keep the kitty!

[nicholmere]

rmthunter said

Losing the other two was kind of horrendous

It can be so painful. You have my sympathies ((Bob)).

[MrsNormanMaine[$]]

Willie, our diabetic cat, died last night. It was somewhat expected, we just didn't know when. The worst thing was all the memories of Steve's death that came flooding back - I rarely give myself permission to feel in that way.

MNM

[hadassahchana[$]]

{{{Bob}}That is so hard, to lose two colse together. When that happened here, the remaining cat became very clingy. We finally did get another cat- actually, two kittens. The older cat was once again her old crotchety self- she was never happier than when she had soemone else to boss around.

{{{Andy}}}

Yep, we've had that happen. My theory is that when we experience a prodound loss like that of a partner, it's just too much for us to grieve fully at the time, so it happens gradually in situations like yours over a longer period of time. Hugs, it is so hard to lose a pet at any time but even harder to lose a pet you loved together with someone else who is gone.


Cindy

[rmthunter]

Andy -

Yeah. I know what you're talking about. Millie, especially, was a little too much deja vu.

Bob

[ms_n]

s

[theworm[$]]

Bob, Andy, MJ - hugs to you all!!!!

[Magick1]

Bob and Andy, I wanted to give you both a big hug!

[murasaki]

Andy - I'm so sorry.