It came to my attention that #1's lunch fund was considerably heftier than it should have been for the end of the month, and I knew that he forgets his lunch from home more often than not. So, I worried that he was trying to lose weight or something. I tried to ask in a way which would not make him think I was snooping, but after all, I am the one who fills the money jar.
He was quite proud to explain exactly how he was being fed these days. It seems he is a kept man. Every day for the past month, someone's been buying lunch for him. Ok, and any other students they can corral. The various student associations have a hard time getting members, because Oakland is a commuter campus. So, during noon hour, the student center is filled with notices of upcoming meetings, all of which include a free lunch.
So far, his rating system looks like this:
Student Council, C- (cold chicken nuggets)
Chaldean Student Association, A. Really good sandwiches and fresh juice, not from concentrate.
Commuter Students Association, B. Pizza, but only pepperoni.
Jewish Student Council, F. Only bagels, no cream cheese, no drink. The bagels were stale, too.
Association of Women Scientists, B. Plain sandwiches, but homemade cookies.
Wiccan Circle, A ++. Fresh veggie plates with warm rolls and dips.
Gay and Lesbian Students, A for effort, C for execution. Barbecue, two kinds of salad and nicely decorated cake. However, barbecue was greasy and cake was bland.
Apparently he didn't make the cut when trying to dine with the Association of Democratic University Professors. It's a shame, too, because apparently they were having fried chicken. He likes that.
Of course, as all of these groups are handing out food, they are asking if he would like to join. Ok, the Women Scientists, not so much, but he did get an email address. The Chaldean students were really nice to him, told him to come back to lunch with them next term, but also didn't think he'd fit in. Everyone else was relaly friendly, and he was asked to run for a position on the Student Commuter board.
And we all thought that #4 was a threat to others! Tex seems to be the real one to worry his mother. He sort of stands out because of his height with boots and occasional cowboy hat. And his ever-increasing circle of FWF - uh, Friends With Food.
When Poe ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.
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