Tackling Tuesday

[cyndilouwhoo]

Well, here we are. It’s Tuesday and thank goodness for that because I am <moooooaaaan> so sore from the workout orientation at the gym that I feel like I am thisclose to packing it in and forgetting the whole darn thing.

Obstacles.

Darnit they are everywhere.

If this was Whiner Wednesday (which it isn’t, so don’t get all excited ) we could all complain about the roadblocks life puts in the way of our progress:

The Pain

The Lack of Time

The Stress

And here’s one for the ladies: The Lunar Cycle.

After limping through the day yesterday, after almost a week of total exhaustion, I finally stopped complaining about having no sleep and did something about it: I went to bed at 8pm.

Today is the day you pick an issue, a problem, an obstacle and you do something about it.

So what is the thing that slows your progress? What are you going to do to get that darn roadblock out of your road to success?

Tell us about it.

[taurusmoon]

That's a good question, Cyndi. I've been pondering this for the past hour or so.

There are tons of roadblocks in my way. But, the biggest one is the one I have the most control over. Me.

It's very easy to find excuses. Especially for me. I've got a talent for that. If there was an Excuse Olympics I'd be a gold medalist in multiple events.

Many times a day I find myself saying "I can't because..." And, quite often I fall for it. What I've been trying to do is to retrain myself to say "it will be difficult because.... but I can do it."

I often go so far as to punish myself for negative thinking. Many a time I've set out for a walk and my mind begins whining early on. "I'm too tired. I want to go home. I want to go in this direction because it's easier." That's when I slap my mind silly and tell it to behave. I then proceed to set a tougher goal for myself that day. I seek out the hills, I change courses to add a couple of miles to my predetermined route, I pick up the pace a bit. And, in the end it feels good to have accomplished what my mind wanted to wheedle itself out of. Really good as a matter of fact.

After a while, I learn that if I'm going to start making excuses I'll have me to contend with.

Some challenges are tough to meet. The change of season thing, the pressures of responsibility at work and at home, malaise, inertia.... the list can get very long. But the tougher the challenge, the more gratifying it is to meet it.

This week my biggest challenge is time. I was planning to put in a few days at the gym but that might not happen. I'm a wee bit overextended with appointments in the evenings. And, let's talk about priorities, I have the ALCS games to watch. I think this may be the week to start doing crunches in front of the tv set. And, there is that stationary bike collecting dust...

Sara

[cyndilouwhoo]

I've been thinking about this a lot too.

In some respects I wish that champion excuse making was my biggest problem.

Mine is how overwhelmed I become sometimes.

I am feeling really overwhelmed this week and it's a major roadblock. When I am feeling this way, everything goes out the window.

I haven't taken my vitamins yet and it's 11am.

Last night I ate not one, but two slices of chocolate cake--and frankly I didn't even enjoy them.

I haven't even strapped on my ped this morning--which means I am not interested in doing any appreciable walking.

I can't even think about the gym.

There is no rational reason for any of these responses--they are just responses to the fact that I feel like I can't cope with anything, so I just won't.

I have spent a lot of "thought time" on this today. Despite the 11.5 hours of sleep I got last night I am still really tired--and fatigue certainly plays a part in developing these kinds of feelings.

Short of calling my doctor and asking for a Wellbutrin prescription (A thought that seriously crossed my mind this morning) I am going to try to break things down into pieces that are easier for me to deal with.

I am first and foremost going to take things one day at a time.

I am going to try to focus on doing one thing at a time.

I am going to try to resurrect my to-do list so I can see that things are not as overwhelming as I believe they are. I will cross things off the list as I complete them so I will see that effort yields results.

I am going to do what I can do today and not freak out if something slips.

The things I choose to do today will be things that will be good for me. I have spent the last 2 days trying to catch up on being a good mom and a good wife because I have felt guilty about leaving my husband and kids to cope on their own while I go and do my thing at the theater. I have totally neglected myself--and I think I need a reminder that I am no good for anyone if I'm not good for me first.

So those are my goals for today. Hopefully they'll clear up my head. I'll let you know

Cyndi

Going off to cross off the vitamins and ped from her to-do list.

[taurusmoon]

Cyndi! Get yourself back on the wagon. You know that if you give in for too long you'll wind up on a sure path to self-destruction. Been there. Done that. Bought the t-shirt (in the plus size dept.).

Now, if you need some motivation, I'll give you some:

Neglect yourself and you'll have to deal with me. You don't want that, do you?

Sara
Who has not yet begun to nag

[cyndilouwhoo]

Don't worry Sara. Half the trick of calling a halt to these feelings is recognizing them and developing a strategy to deal with them.

I may have stumbled a bit, but I am not quitting because I have taken the time to think things through and not simply allow life's ups and downs to drag me passively along.

Acknowledging the fact that I feel this way helps me immeasurably. When you can say, "Yeah, this is happening and here's why" it makes it simpler to do something about it.

Sooooo....

Vitamins taken. Check
Pedometer on (and turned on ). Check.
Bills paid. Check.

Cyndi

Still working her way slowly through her to-do list

[AmyLEnsor]

Originally posted by cyndilouwhoo

Mine is how overwhelmed I become sometimes.

{{{{{Cyndi}}}}} I wasn't going to post this here, but you've inspired me. Yesterday was one of those days where I couldn't get out of the house. I spent a lot of time online in the morning while my daughter slept in, then all of a sudden she was awake and doing her usual thing of jumping from activity to activity and I had plans for us to get out of the house. Everytime I tried to suggest to her that we go out, walk to the park, perhaps walk to get ice cream or milk (I'm already starting to bribe her) she just kept saying "No, want stay home!" Because of her disinterest, I kept checking back on the computer or reading books and time just seemed to slide on by with no progress on any front.

Finally I got us both showered and dressed and we ate lunch. All of a sudden it was like 4 pm and we hadn't done anything. I hate that feeling because I start to panic and feel this incredible need to accomplish something productive. I went out, got the jogger stroller, set it all up with the stuff I would need for a long walk, but I just couldn't get my daughter into it. I could have forced her, but I figured the walk would be unpleasant. Plus, for some reason, I just had no energy. I kept wanting to go back to bed. The day felt like one of those dreams people have where they know they have to go somewhere, but can't seem to make themselves do it. I lacked the escape velocity for the incredible gravity of the house. I saw the sun going down and I decided I would wait for my husband to come home, then I would walk in the dark.

Right after 6 pm, my daughter decided that it was time to go out for a walk. Ummm, no way, not now girl! I have it planned out. I'm going to clean the house like a mad woman until your dad comes home. That will lift my mood enough so that I can go out and take my walk. Nope, didn't happen. Instead I ended up taking her around the neighborhood because I figured it would be good for her to get some exercise out of doors.

Every little thing was bugging me and seemed like an obstacle. When I looked out the back door, I saw little patches in the lawn that bugged me. All of a sudden I felt the need to do something about it. When I looked around the house, there were 50 different things that needed to be done. There was mail in one place, and a cups in glasses in various places, and the floor seemed gritty, and the baseboards seemed dusty and the mirrors were smudged. All of a sudden I just couldn't cope with all of these little things that normally don't overwhelm me. I started to wonder if maybe I had PMS or something. Either that, or my parenting style was too permissive and I was allowing my daughter to control me which was leading to these feelings of helplessness. But then I decided that she's been out almost every day this week and both days of the weekend so maybe she just needed some time to take it easy. Unfortunately, she seemed a little stir crazy too.

Finally my husband came home and I went for a walk at 7:30. I walked 2 miles down to Diedrich's coffee, got a cup of the dark brew of the day, walked the 2 miles back home. The whole way down I was so tired and kept thinking I should just turn around and go home. But the walk back was great! Uphill too, so maybe that is what I needed. After my caffeine and exertion, I was feeling great. My mind was clear and I had energy. I ended up putting the kid and her dad to bed and doing some chores around the house.

Anyway, there are just days where I feel like I am hopelessly mired in a mess and can't break free, and then every little thing that is out of place bothers me and I can't cope with even the smallest thing in an organizational sense, and yesterday was one of those days!

I am going to do what I can do today and not freak out if something slips.

That is the right attitude. Somedays maybe the only thing I do is eat my 5 servings of vegetables, or take a walk. I love the days where I seem to do everything right, but those are few and far between. I figure I have to get certain things under my belt first before I can tackle everything. But I think I'll start making some lists of what my goals are and what I'd like to consistently achieve on a daily basis (I think not wanting to knock my child senseless should be first on the list).

[lynnzop[$]]

That is the right attitude. Somedays maybe the only thing I do is eat my 5 servings of vegetables, or take a walk.

Hey, we all have THOSE days...and at least you are getting in some good things!

I myself had a mixed day so far. Our workshop was great - very inspiring - and probably it felt especially good because our last workshop was on 9/11.

But because we were confined in a conference area, my steps are way down for this time of day. However, it's gorgeous outside and I think I can talk the little boys into going for a walk

My roadblock? LOL, I can pick that one out of any crowd. It's EATING. I admitted to one of my WW buddies today that I DO journal my food, but I don't keep track of points. Bad, bad Lynn. I just know if I've overeaten for the day and I walk/run it off at some point in the day. So far it's working, but what happens when I hit a plateau? What happens when I hit my goal weight and get on maintenance and have to figure out "how many" points I am supposed to spend to stay the same?

I'm admittedly poor at calorie counting, carb counting, fat gram counting, etc., (which translates into point counting). I need to get over that hurdle if I want this weight loss to last - which I DO.

Believe me, boys and girls, there ain't no goin' back for this girl.

Lynn

[murasaki]

I got my work out in today as planned and I'm starting to get into a better groove--knowing which machines I'll do, what weights and positions I need, etc.

My biggest challenge lately: time. I'm in the middle of the semester and all the big projects are starting to creep up on me, especially since I've spent the last two weekends do way more than I should have with my husband and way less studying. I need to say no but I hate for him to be completely bored all the time.

Anyway, I'll be in and out, quite possibly until December and I'm done with this semester's madness!

--naomi

[cyndilouwhoo]

Amy, I am so glad you shared. All the things you said and felt are right on the money as far as my own feelings go.

I could have written that note.

Do do do do

(and thanks for the hug! I needed that )

And Lynn...everything you wrote is very typical of what people who are "almost there" feel.

It's scary to think about what will happen when the day finally comes and you are finally where you imagined yourself you would be way back when--"What now?"

What is even worse is feeling that you are falling off the wagon even as you ride it. Feeling only partly in control over what you are putting in your mouth will do that.

I've said it before and I'll say it again: Keep your food journal and total your points.

You know why you need to do it--so do it. It isn't eating that's the roadblock--it's not managing your eating that'll do ya' in every time.

Cyndi

The preceding message was brought to you by the INA*




*The International Nagger's Association

My obstacle is my overwhelming anger and hate for those that turned my television station into a rat-infested, low-ratings s-hole in the 4 years I was there and made it impossible for me to stay. It paralyzed me… it me into made a statue of shock and indignation and self-righteousness. My rancor is a pyre upon which my soul has been searing and roasting in agony for months, screaming for revenge and bloody murder.

I now know who has been my worst enemy all this time: me. And I will use that to my advantage.

I have turned that self-hate into a different kind of fuel, and I can use my general sense of obsessive-compulsion as a tool. Instead of destroying myself entirely over that inner conflict, I will redirect it into destroying that of myself I cannot stand to keep one pound at a time until I reach my goal of 175 pounds. I ate to fill a void, and instead now I will cast chunks myself into that void one bit at a time with every step, every pushup, every situp, every revolting tasteless rice cake I consume, every gallon of water that I use to flush out the feelings of bitter bile.

I stomp on your face with every step I take, Henry.
I stomp on your face with every step I take, Jim.
I stomp on your face with every step I take, Rob.
I stomp on your face with every step I take, Dan.
And I keep walking.

The final pound I eliminate out of my body will be the hate for those motherf-ers, and I will know that the person I see in the mirror doesn't have to be a part of that worthless clusterf- they claim serves the public's interest and pollutes the invisible spectrum with their worthless hype-driven fear-programming. I will not fall victim to this tornado of disgust… it will not carry me away… it will crescendo… and then one single fading note like "A Day In The Life" by the Beatles.

When I started all this, the needle had finally slid to 225. Now, after my walk today, that needle rests on 200. Those coworkers and friends who believed in me called me Legend. Legend isn't done yet. Legend doesn't stop. Legend makes a goal and kicks the s- out of it and anybody who stands in his path. Legend has work to do now. Legend will make that scale say 175 and tear it apart with his bare hands in a victory celebration some day soon.

Until then, MARCH!

[pluckyduck]

I am feeling really overwhelmed this week and it's a major roadblock. When I am feeling this way, everything goes out the window.

See, Cyndi, we did have our psychic connection, just a few days out of sync. This is so where I was on Friday, when you were all reved up. Now, I'm much more on the upswing.

Which illusrates how variable the whole thing is. Up, down, down, up, inside out. Whatever.

Okay, we all know people who appear to be in control all the time. For all I know, those people really are as together as they appear, or for all I know they are just faking it...but one way or another, I'm not that person. Not only am I person of extremes, I'm absolutely worthless if I try to even myself out. If I try to be reasonably good at everything instead of marvelous at somethings and rotten stinko at others, I just end up sucking all the way around.

So, my MO has been to just crash through life and try to pick up the pieces when I really crash. I'm getting better, much better at not crashing, as I'm finally getting used to and comfortable with the me that I am. It's given me the courage to try things that I heretofore wouldn't have, for fear of failure out of the starting gate....I swear, turning 40 has been one of the best things that ever happened to me.

Except when I'm hormonal, I don't get as excited about the near crashes any more. I'm not losing weight because I'm not doing enough with my eating. Oh well. I guess, eventually it will become important enough to me to make that a top priority. (When something is a top priority, I kick ass, it's all those secondary priorities that go by the wayside.) It was important enough to me to stop gaining weight. The minute I said I would, I did, and there we go.

I've learned it is possible to be centered on the inside, even when you are flustered on the outside. It's possible to be happy with yourself even when you're not happy with everything you are doing or aren't doing.

All we are really asking of ourselves is that we grow. Not one of the wacky folks who visits this forum regularly is the sort to be robot consistent every day, day in and day out. Emerson said, "Foolish consistency is hobgoblin of little minds." Now, I don't know his context, so for all I know I'm completely misusing his quote, but, hell, what's he going to do about it?

Andrea

[soxfan[$]]

My obstacle's the same as other folks -- I get stressed out about all the things on my plate. I find it all too easy to slip into a funk, worrying about stuff and doing none of it. I'm getting better at catching myself, though.

Today was actually a good day. I spent about an hour practicing the rumba and foxtrot around my (really small) bedroom. I'm happy about the steps, even though my knees are complaining a bit.

Ailsa
who needs all the practice she can get