Are you tough enough Thursday?

[cyndilouwhoo]

Whoa. What a week. We’ve had a lot of curveballs thrown at us in the course of our quest to get (and stay) healthy.

Stress.

Anxiety.

Clothing that refuses to stay on.

Rabid Partners with Attytood .

I’m pretty proud of all of us though. We have toughed out the tough times and we are all still here, all still working toward making changes that will surely change our lives if we just continue to ride out the rough spots.

We are all continuing to work through the stress and the anxiety of our overscheduled lives. I, for one, have rediscovered the anti-stress benefits of banging out several million reps at the weight room—and I’m wandering over to sing its praises after I post this.

But what about the people in our lives who for good or ill throw up roadblocks to impede our progress?

“You look great, just the way you are. Why are you working so hard?”

“I think you are spending too much time on this silly self-improvement program. Why are you neglecting us?”

“Are you sure walking at night is safe?”

As if what life itself throws at us isn’t bad enough, the people in our lives manufacture problems for us.

Sometimes people can’t or don’t want to offer the kind of support we need to succeed. And the reasons for these kinds of reactions are endless.

So what do you do about those moments when the people around you are less than supportive of your efforts?

Are you tough enough to get past this and keep on keepin’ on? Have you developed strategies to deal with these kinds of times?

Tell us all about it.

[jenninca]

Originally posted by cyndilouwhoo

“You look great, just the way you are. Why are you working so hard?”

“I think you are spending too much time on this silly self-improvement program. Why are you neglecting us?”

“Are you sure walking at night is safe?”

Forget other people! That's my negative side talking to my positive side!

[taurusmoon]

You mean like, "Are you sure you want to go to the Y now? You know, it's not the cleanest place, all that sweat and such. And it's very crowded. It's the perfect place for anthrax exposure or some other terrorist attack."

This from one of the most intelligent people I know.


Let's face it. The time we spend on ourselves is time spent away from our significant others. It's a huge threat to them.

Not to mention the fact that as we look and feel better, our self-esteem and self-confidence improves. Threat #2.


I haven't been to the gym in more than a week. Mind you, I only went there a total of two times. I'm spending this week working out issues instead of my thighs. Next week, after several days of ego massaging, I'll be back on track (and the treadmill).

I owe it to me and I owe it to him too. If I give up now because of someone else's spoken and unspoken fears I will only grow to resent him. And I can't let that happen. He really is a good man, despite his momentary lapse of reason.

Men. Can't live with 'em. Can't shoot 'em.

Sara

[cyndilouwhoo]

Excellent point Cindy! I think it was Sara who said that we can be our own toughest critics.

But we all seem able to (mostly) ignore the voices from our own heads pretty well--at least most of the time

My spouse was in one of his "Royal We" kinds of moods yesterday. He was peeved that I went to the gym instead of coming home to take care of his needs. Of course that isn't what he said exactly--but I got the message.

I think he feels bad; even though I think he is fine the way he is, I get the sense that he feels badly that he isn't the rangy young power cyclist of his youth.

I try to support him when he starts a diet or exercise program--I get out of the road and let him do his thing--but for whatever reason he never sticks with it.

Are there any gentlemen lurking who could shed some light on this phenomenon?

Am I supporting him in the "wrong" sort of way? Is my own self-improvement work threatening to him?

I think Sara is right when she says that taking a little time to keep the home fires burning is important. I am going to take her advice and do just that today.

But I also feel really strongly, like Sara, that if I don't take time to take care of me when I have made it a priority, I will surely begin to resent the mixed messages I get sent.

Again I ask: Gentlemen? What is your take on this?

Cyndi

Who seems to be driving her spouse nuts

[hypotenuse]

Originally posted by taurusmoon
Men. Can't live with 'em. Can't shoot 'em.

Sara

You can't?

Oh dear.

Lynne - who best get the body out of the closet and take it to the landfill....

[jenninca]

I'm thinking I'd better sit down with boyfriend tomorrow (conference night tonight) and see if I can figure out what he needs. He has been awfully good to me since I've been here.

Other people really aren't standing in the way of me too much. I'm willing to bet that a lot of this is because I really haven't told anyone except boyfriend and one friend at work what I'm doing. I think it's the "fear of failure" thing. If I fail at this, no one can "laugh" at me if they don't know I'm doing it.

I think I could go on about this, but I have to go get stuff ready for today.

Cindy

[cyndilouwhoo]

Ahhh, Cindy...

I think I may borrow your worries for tomorrow's thread, 'k?

Cyndi

Looking to steal a good topic for Friday. Just found it.

>Clothing that refuses to stay on.

Since when is this a problem?

>We are all continuing to work through the stress and the
>anxiety of our overscheduled lives.

Not here. Vastly underscheduled, and I still don't do all I need to. Why? Because there's going to be even more time tomorrow to fill.

>“You look great, just the way you are.
>Why are you working so hard?”

I've gotten that one. I usually bend over, drop my shorts, and say "Here's a better angle to view my fat ass. Now do you understand why I am doing this?"

>“I think you are spending too much time on this silly self
>improvement program. Why are you neglecting us?”

"Because you say stupid sh*t like that. Now get back on the short bus and leave me alone, retard."

Self-improvement is not just limited to the self. It can also be extended to auditing the connections and ties to others that may have been out of convenience or necessity, but now are obsolete or just plain goofy.

Shun banality when you have not the means to annihilate it.

>“Are you sure walking at night is safe?”

"Fine, I'll wear garlic and carry a cross, dumbass."

>And the reasons for these kinds of reactions are endless.

1. Stupidity
2. Pure selfishness
3. Gross insensitivity
4. Serious brain damage
5. Under the influence of Pez
6. Carnal attraction to fatties
7. Overwhelming envy

A lot of the pasty-faced weasels that are faux-friends that say I look great need a little more grease in the flywheels in their heads, because I can see it on their faces: "Damn, you look great. 25 pounds? And that tan from being outside a lot does wonders for you. I wish I looked great instead of like a beached bleached whale. Maybe if you didn't look so great, I wouldn't look like crap by comparison."

>So what do you do about those moments when the people
>around you are less than supportive of your efforts?

Manufacture more problems for them than they do to you, and the people problem is solved.

>Are you tough enough to get past this and keep on keepin’ on?

What do you think, punk?

[cyndilouwhoo]

Oh my, File...

I only wish I could respond by the people who make it tough for me to keep going.

But I can't--and although I would venture to guess you'd like to do this too, you really don't--else we would be seeing your name in the police log of your local paper.

Seriously, (and I mean seriously) how do you let people know that you will keep going no matter what "they" think--bearing in mind that the silly social graces need to be taken into consideration when replying.

I haven't yet been provoked enough by the envious and the well-meaning to jump ugly--at least out loud.

I was telling Lynnzop (who was complaining about her less than slender friends' insistence in overseeing what kind of dessert she puts in her mouth) that the best way to get around those who insist that we stuff our faces because "You deserve it" is to order the offending item--and push it around the plate to make it look like you have eaten some of it.

Is this wimpy? Maybe. Is it effective? Most of the time.

Sometimes, the simple act of declining gracefully isn't acceptable to others. I weigh what is important to me (i.e., maintaining the weight I worked so hard to lose) against the five bucks it costs to get a dessert.

A slim, healthy me wins every time.

Yeah, I shouldn't have to do this. In my fantasy world, after charm and grace fails, I could tell these people to take a flying leap. But I can't.

Because sometimes these people really don't have a clue as to what they are "really" saying.

So really; what do you do?

Cyndi

[pluckyduck]

I interupt this train of thought (I'll be back, I promise! ) to give you guys health for people who are tough enough:


http://www.hooah4health.com/

Really cool website I came across while doing some research for work...a health & wellness readiness program the Army has been working on for a few years. The whole incentive program is supposed to kick off on 10/22, but will probably be delayed due to the latest stuff.

Anyway, it is chock full of resources.

Andrea
sneaking back to work now....

[pluckyduck]

Okay, I'm back with one image to show you how cool the site is:




Bye!

Andrea

[conradd]

Are you tough enough to get past this and keep on keepin’ on? Have you developed strategies to deal with these kinds of times?

My son is enthusiastic about my increased fitness - I'm wondering if he isn't just enjoying having the house to himself when I go a'wandering.

The dog loves it - I usually drag her along and she loves getting out of the house (unless it's raining).

I put up the most roadblocks. Yesterday, I drove Shane to school then returned home with the intention of going for a 2 mile hike. I sat down on my nice warm bed (electric mattress pads are soooo wonderful) and fell asleep. Woke up at noon.

Today, I took him to school and was seriously tempted to take another morning nap - yesterday felt good. But, my brakes went out on the way home. After rolling right though a stopsign, I drove (very carefully, at 5 mph) to the nearest tire store. I could have waited for several hours in the waiting room while they figure out what is wrong, but I decided to walk home. Two miles. When it's fixed, I'll walk back to pick it up. Two more miles. And, when I got home, I didn't need a nap. There's a lesson in that somewhere. I just need to kick myself in the butt and get out there and walk.

Deb

[taurusmoon]

Originally posted by conradd

There's a lesson in that somewhere. I just need to kick myself in the butt and get out there and walk.

Deb

Yep. Walk more and your brakes will last longer.

Sara

[lynnzop[$]]

My initial reaction when I saw Cyndi's topic of the day was to say

NO

I am NOT feeling tough today.

After congratulating myself (even just this a.m.!) that I have managed to stave off all viruses etc., for over 6 months, my body decided that the combined stress of the last 3 months, oncoming cold, and whatever else were just too much and I shut down. I was babbling incoherent stuff at work and decided I'd best just go home before the dark circles under my eyes started to look like Goth makeup.

So I came home and took a four-hour nap. I don't even know where my pedometer is. Sara, Andrea, please give me dispensation on the walk club for the day

As far as feeling tough (on other days), I've found that insisting (like the dessert thing) works on some people. But on others, I have to remember to give a little myself.

Yes, I'm important. And I need to take the time to do the things that are important to me. And my husband (and son and daughter) will benefit by having a happier, more healthy person in their lives.

BUT.

They are important too. I tend to be an all-or-nothing person; there isn't a lot of grey in my vocabulary or way of thinking. I need to remember that while I need to take time for me, I need to remember to balance that with time for THEM too. Sometimes it's including them in my activities (going for a walk, eating more healthy foods, etc.,), sometimes it's giving a little of what I might consider MY time back to them.

That's probably the biggest reason I haven't joined a gym. The additional time it takes me to travel, work out, etc., takes additional time away from my family.

Maybe I'm lucky...my closest support people have gotten past being roadblocks and are quite supportive. I think over the last six months, they have grown a little too. Yeah, they still have their moments of "ME ME ME", and I've learned to recognize this and give a little when they really need me.

Lynn
(Who will feel better tomorrow)

[murasaki]

I hadn't heard about the "hooah" website. I've got to check that out. It's already giving me the giggles--some power point ranger went to town with this. I read the first page and the bit about Reservists needing to keep fit --very much a stereotype that reservists are fat asses.

Lifted weights today. I'm trying to add a little more weight to my arm exercises. I'm wondering if I should also start doing leg presses and such; I usually don't do weights on my legs because I run the next day and because the running is already weight-bearing exercise.

As for people standing in my way: yeah, I get the comments. "You're so thin, you don't need to work out." I'm fit because I do work out. I can tell when I've sluffed off running: my clothes tell me, and I just feel it.

Exercise is a lifetime commitment, and sometimes that seems overwhelming to me to think about. But I keep at it because it matters more that I do a little bit every day or every few days than some big push later on.

--naomi

[lynnzop[$]]

I checked out the Hooha site - I really like the videos! Part of my problem with doing any kind of "real" exercises is that I have a hard time visualizing what to do from text only.

murasaki wrote:

"You're so thin, you don't need to work out." I'm fit because I do work out. I can tell when I've sluffed off running: my clothes tell me, and I just feel it.

The first time I went into our WW meeting, I looked at some of the people in the room and thought "They are thin, what the heck are they doing in here?"

It's because they'd been there for several months before and were successful!

Now I have those same comments (to some extent)..."If you lose any more weight, you'll blow away!" for example (that from my heavy friends who try to force feed me dessert). I just laugh and say "Yeah, well, good thing I have my feel planted firmly on the ground!"

I'm not going to let anyone interfere with my sense of well-being and accomplishment. It's my body, and I've decided to make it look and feel the way I want it to.

Lynn
(Feeling better I can tell because I'm starting to be back to my beligerent self)

[pluckyduck]

I actually have something to say on the subject at hand, but I had one of those days. Ever have one of those days?



Post actually belongs in the "time thread", but what the hell, it's also about Thursday.

Nothing bad whatsoever happened to me today, I've just been running from the second I got up until now. I have nearly 11,000 steps to show for it, , but , this is the first second I have for myself.

The wheels started to fall off my home organizational bus this AM, so I got up around 6, did some things around the house, spent a little time on the board, and started the Morning Kid Whirlwind at 7AM....that pretty much takes me to 8:45...which pretty much takes me to getting myself ready and getting out the door.

Whirlwindy work day...pretty much no time on the board...pretty much no time to think about anything but work (no walks at lunch, no time to walk part way home in meeting Don).....Grumpy, Grumpy DH day...which means I fly in the door and make dinner (instead of having something waiting for me)....talking to the kids about their day while making dinner....immediately after dinner, work with both of the kids on their reading program....schedule DH for backrub (take some grumpiness out, please)....get Adam in the shower, backrub DH....switch to Dan in the bath, more backrub for DH.....

And here I am.

Did I mention I had to feed the dog and there was no dog food?

Okay, it's 9 O'Clock and I really want a glass of wine and the couch. But fortunately, there is no wine .... so I think I'll take sometime to get some kind of exercise in. (been a couple days since I concentrated on anything like that)

What a day! No sympathy necessary, thank heavens every day isn't like this. I'm going on 13 hours straight of just moving from one thing to the next thing and doing two things at once most of the time.

HOW do you people with more children do this???

Andrea
pretty sure that is her name

[taurusmoon]

Arrggggh! Andrea, can I trade days with you?

I was stuck at my desk all day. No steps.

I drove home in traffic. No steps.

I walked in the door, dropped of my stuff and went right back to the car. Maybe 50 steps.

I drove to the blood center (no steps) where I was hooked up to a pheresis machine for an hour and a half. That's 25 minutes longer than usual. No steps.

Then I had to have an obligatory cup of coffee and 20 minutes of chit chat with the platelet donation recruiter. Nice guy but no steps.

I drove home (no steps), wolfed down dinner (maybe 15 steps to bring the dish to the computer) and dealt with cat pee on the couch (if I strapped the pedometer to my arm I'd have plenty of steps, but I didn't, so no steps.)

Now I'm sitting at the computer whining one day late. No steps.


It is 9:06 pm and I have a grand total of 5,170 steps.

Obviously I am not tough enough.

Sara
Off to march in place while watching the Yankee game

[slick4591[$]]

Again I ask: Gentlemen? What is your take on this?

by Tammy Wynette
Sometimes it's hard to be a lover
Givin' all your love to just one man
You'll have bad times
And he'll have good times
Doin' things that you don't understand

But if you love him you'll forgive him
Even though he's hard to understand
And if you love him
Oh be proud of him
`Cause after all he's just a man


Stand by your man
Give him two arms to cling to
And something warm to come to
When nights are cold and lonely


Stand by your man
And show the world you love him
Keep givin' all the love you can
Stand by your man

Since you asked.

[taurusmoon]

Sara

[AmyLEnsor]

Originally posted by taurusmoon
Yep. Walk more and your brakes will last longer.

Sara

I'm relying on this, actually. I need an oil change, brake job, new tires and so on. I keep thinking if I walk to the store, post office and so on, I can put off getting my car worked on. OK, I just keep forgetting about it, in truth, so I have no choice but to walk