14 year old males

**conradd** · #1 07-15-2007, 05:22 PM

Okay, maybe raising teens who are going through adolescence is like childbirth - you forget the pain and remember the result. But after spending the last 24 hours watching fireworks between a frustrated father and an unmotivated and extremely mouthy and disrespectful 14yo who knows every button to push and does so with unfailing accuracy . . . let me just say that I can't remember it ever being this difficult.

Aaaarrgh.

erik_kosberg · #2 07-15-2007, 06:27 PM

As the father of a 14 year old male, I know all too well what you're talking about.

**Prepoia**[$] · #3 07-15-2007, 07:57 PM

As the teacher of 14 year olds, I know as well.

**theworm**[$] · #4 07-15-2007, 08:16 PM

I shall remain childless

**mjfrombuffalo**[$] · #5 07-15-2007, 08:19 PM

Try five of 'em in a group home with 7 older boys egging them on!

**lynnzop**[$] · #6 07-15-2007, 10:17 PM

Delia, I'll send you mine.

**Prepoia**[$] · #7 07-15-2007, 10:19 PM

And for dessert, try a 14 year old attitudinal girl

**conradd** · #8 07-15-2007, 10:45 PM

LOL, his 11yo sister isn't far behind. I get along with her pretty well but have never developed any kind of relationship with the son. I've tried.

After this morning's blowup, he took off on his bike and life has been pretty quiet today. It's been nice.

Shane was opinionated and mouthy at that age, but he wasn't blatantly disprespectful and rude. It's hard to watch.

**thinkerlady**[$] · #9 07-15-2007, 11:45 PM

Quote:

Prepoia said

And for dessert, try a 14 year old attitudinal girl

How 'bout 30 of them at once??? Man do I love summer.

frazzledspice · #10 07-16-2007, 02:15 AM

Have raised 2 boys and 1 girl through the early teens....

I never appreciated how low-maintenance the boys were when they were teens. I do now.

Teenage girls are three times as aggravating and ten times more expensive (and every mom I share this story with usually agrees.)

**thinkerlady**[$] · #11 07-16-2007, 09:38 AM

Quote:

frazzledspice said

Have raised 2 boys and 1 girl through the early teens....

I never appreciated how low-maintenance the boys were when they were teens. I do now.

Teenage girls are three times as aggravating and ten times more expensive (and every mom I share this story with usually agrees.)

Here, here, I will second that, and drink to that!!! Having been through 1 boy and 1 girl I can certainly agree!!!

**lynnzop**[$] · #12 07-16-2007, 10:05 AM

No way in hell. Give me a girl to raise over a boy any day. At least the one I did.

I get into this argument with every parent I know...but when I offer to trade my boy for their girl, they magically skirt the question.

(and no, I would NOT trade him for anything...he's just, well...Jer.....)

**thinkerlady**[$] · #13 07-16-2007, 10:12 AM

See Lynn--all kids are different. Missy is much more high maintenance than her brother. Always has been, and probably always will be. She is that type of person. From the beginning as a baby she was more difficult than her brother was. Neither had medical issues, just temperament.

For Father's Day she found a card that proclaimed her 'Princess High Maintenance'. It was a perfect fit.

Now Ted is more relaxed, less pressured, and less demanding. He has his moments of need, but they aren't the same.

I try to tell parents all the time that you can't compare kids, even in the same family. They are all different.

**lynnzop**[$] · #14 07-16-2007, 11:13 AM

Oh, absolutely agree, Angie. Bree and Jer are as different as night and day (right Sis?

). But my point is that without fail, I hear "girls are sooooo much harder to raise than boys" and I disagree completely, based on my experience.

**Prepoia**[$] · #15 07-16-2007, 11:25 AM

I sometimes think that birth order has a bearing on it too. Although, for Angie that wouldn't work. When I teach brothers and sisters of other students that I've had it seems that the first born is usually the easiest.

My girl has been 100 times more difficult than my son was. The girls and boys at school tend to be problematic to me when they are attitudinal no matter which sex they are. Some kids just are high maintenance.

**amykhar** · #16 07-16-2007, 11:27 AM

I think other people's kids tend to irritate us more than our own in many ways. We get used to our own kids quirks and behaviors, which probably drive other people nuts.

**thinkerlady**[$] · #17 07-16-2007, 11:37 AM

Quote:

lynnzop said

Oh, absolutely agree, Angie. Bree and Jer are as different as night and day (right Sis?

). But my point is that without fail, I hear "girls are sooooo much harder to raise than boys" and I disagree completely, based on my experience.

And I would have to agree with you on this one!! (No, I am not changing my point of view, here) See even though Teddy is easer, I don't always know what he wants or needs or what I need to do for him. It is usually a guessing game. He is always content and laid back,which makes it difficult at times. With him, anything goes, he doesn't need much, and he is generally always pleasant and happy. Give him a couch and he is asleep and happy.

OTOH, Missy is very much like me in almost every way. She was as a baby, and a child very demanding, but I knew how to meet her needs. She was definitely more work than her brother, but I could rise to the occasion because I knew what she needed. Even now, she is always on the go.

**conradd** · #18 07-16-2007, 12:41 PM

Quote:

amykhar said

I think other people's kids tend to irritate us more than our own in many ways. We get used to our own kids quirks and behaviors, which probably drive other people nuts.

True. I think you'd have to have memories of an adorable baby and a charming toddler in order to get through the teen years with some measure of enjoyment. (Of course that means forgetting the 2 a.m. feedings and the tantrums). Selective memory parenting, but you need memories to select from.