How do you get to Carnegie Hall?

[hadassahchana[$]]

I am feeling so grumpy right now! For birthday, all of our friends chipped in and bought #2 a really nice electric guitar, and I bought him an amp. I'm paying for guitar lessons and he has a fabulous teacher, someone he admires. The teacher was a member of a group who actually recorded stuff and was semi-famous, and the guy is amazing.

The problem? #2 will not practice! He has played around with it, decided that it isn't easy to sound like Flash, or Splash, or whoever that guitarist is on one of his CDs, and has given up. After two frickin' lessons! I am not grumpy, come to think of it, I am ticked!

I never thought I would have to nag him to pracice and I have no experience with this at all. I was so excited when I was allowed to start piano that I had to be forced off the piano in order to go outside, do homework etc. Right now, he's sitting and glaring at me after having played exactly three notes and announcing that he is not going to be successful. I am trying not to scream.

Tips on making him STFU and work on something to make himself succeed? I'm not about to give in on this, I think it's good for kids to stick with something and learn. He is obviously of the opposite mind. So, once again, he and I are butting heads.

[taurusmoon]

One of the problems with learning to play the guitar is that, in the beginning, it involves physical pain -- not only to the ears, but to the fingers.

I don't have any real advice on getting him to work through the pain, only that it may be an explanation of why he's balking at practicing. But if he can use a tip on relieving that pain...

One of the things that's helped me during the many times I had to redevelop callouses after years-long layoffs from playing is to ice my fingertips after playing. An easy (read, not dorky) way of doing that is to hold a glass of ice water in your hand while your flaming fingers cool off. And sipping that water occasionally helps quench your thirst at the same time while not blowing your cover of being too cool to be put out by a little pain.

[lynnzop[$]]

Uh, hon? You don't want to hear this, but I rarely practiced in 15 some years of taking piano lessons. I still rarely "practice" vocals.

I hate to practice. Not everyone loves it.

Make him keep going to lessons though. My parents wouldn't let me quit, thank God.

[magenta321]

Yup, I took guitar lessons for years without ever practicing. It's not ideal maybe, but, it works. As he continues he might like it more and may feel like practicing.

If my dad had made me practice (which he said he would) I would have quit much sooner, and worse yet, I would have resented it.

[pippadaisy[$]]

Beanie is WAY younger, but I made her practice ONE week the full amount. Once she realized how much faster she moves through the book when she practices? She was all over it like white on rice, and asks ME to practice. Cindy, doesn't he practice his katas?

[frazzledspice]

I read once that putting something on the edge of your fingertips (like liquid bandaid) helps--creating a kind of artificial callous.

It sounds like #2 wants to be a lead guitarist, doing those riffs and licks and complicated runs, but you can't run until you can walk.

Personally, I think learning to play chords in the beginning is more fulfilling--at least you can sing along and it sounds full and satisfying.

Learning to play melodies is helpful (and a necessary step for doing riffs) but not as satisfying.

Here's one thing I'd do. Make a list of songs he likes that use the blues progression. Don't get too complicated--just simple I, IV, and V or V7 chords.

There are hundreds, probably thousands.

The first one that comes to mind for me is Elvis "Hound Dog."

You can find lyrics and chords all over the web.

If you find one he likes, and the I, IV, and V chords are B, E, and F#, show him how he can use a capo on the first fret to play that song with chords he knows (C, F, and G.)

So many rock, blues, folk, contemporary Christian, and indie songs have a stock set of fairly simple chords, and if the chords are all bar chords, you can capo them up.

I'm not saying that should be the sum total of his practicing, but it might be motivating.

Good luck.

[jgibson2[$]]

Pippa has a point about the katas. He should remember that he didn't always know those.

Also, since he's convinced he won't be successful, maybe it would be helpful for him to realize that he doesn't have to be "successful" to enjoy playing that guitar.

Is he old enough to be impressed by the fact that this may be a chick-magnet thing if he just works a little at it?

[mjfrombuffalo[$]]

Just getting started with an instrument can be very frustrating, since the noises you're making sound nothing like what you'd like them to sound like. It starts to get easier when the instrument starts sounding like some thing musical. Once the basic technique is down, I'd recommend picking music he really wants to play (within skill level of course) - the teacher should be able to help with that. If you really like the song you're learning, your more likely to spend some time on it as opposed to, say, big band hits of the 40's (what my parents picked out for me for organ lessons).

[hadassahchana[$]]

H'es had a sudden change of heart- and Judy got it. He met a cute girl tonight at a family get-together, and she was sooooo impressed that he plays an electric guitar. He's upstairs practicing right now.


I did talk with him about not running before he learns to walk. This is the child who was furniture walking at 6 weeks, so arguments like that rarely make an impression. But, I love his teacher- just love him! He teaches theory, is teaching him notes and chords, and then each week they work on a short riff from a metal song that #2 likes. The teacher is a much smarter guy than I am. Plus, he used to play in some group that apparently everyone except me has heard of - Sponge, or something like that. Anyway, we're back on track, even if it's only for the time being. Sigh. This child will make my hair so grey that the next two won't have anything to look forward to.

[Helen_B[$]]

Oh, no, they'll think of something, lol!