Baseball strike got you singing a different tune?

[taurusmoon]

From The Sporting News:

Songs to comfort fans in the event of a baseball strike.


I got a good chuckle out of a some of these.

Whaddaya say? Got a few of your own to add to the list?


Sara

[soxfan[$]]

Heh, good list.

I'd add Ani Difranco's "Napoleon," mostly for the refrain.

Ailsa

[CurtisEdmonds]

You've got your
Little ways of hurtin' me
You know just how to tear me up
Leave me in small pieces on the ground
You've got your
Little ways of hurtin' me
They're not real big, but they're real tough
One cold look from you can knock me down

-- Dwight Yoakum

[zachborman]

Subject: Please help the unfortunate

Since September 11, 2001, Americans have come together as never before in our generation. We have banded together to overcome tremendous adversity. We have weathered direct attacks on our own soil, wars overseas, corporate scandal, layoffs, unemployment, stock price plunges, droughts, fires, and a myriad of economic and physical disasters both great and small.

But now, we must come together once again to overcome our greatest challenge yet.

Hundreds of Major League Baseball players in our very own nation are living at, just below, or in most cases far above the seven-figure salary level. And as if that weren't bad enough they could be deprived of their life-giving pay for several months, possibly longer, as a result of the upcoming strike situation.

But you can help!

For only $20,835 a month, about $694.50 a day (that's less than the cost of a large screen projection TV) you can help a MLB player remain economically viable during his time of need. This contribution by no means solves the problem as it barely covers the annual minimum salary, but it's a start, and every little bit will help!

Although $700 may not seem like a lot of money to you, to a baseball player it could mean the difference between spending the strike golfing in Florida or on a Mediterranean cruise. For you, seven hundred dollars is nothing more than a month's rent, half a mortgage payment, two unemployment checks, or a month of medical insurance with COBRA, but to a baseball player, $700 will partially replace his daily salary.

Your commitment of less than $700 a day will enable a player to buy that home entertainment center, trade in the year-old Lexus for a new Ferrari, or enjoy a weekend in Rio.

HOW WILL I KNOW I'M HELPING?

Each month, you will receive a complete financial report on the player you sponsor. Detailed information about his stocks, bonds, 401(k), real estate, and other investment holdings will be mailed to your home. Plus, upon signing up for this program, you will receive an unsigned photo of the player lounging during the strike on a beach somewhere in the Caribbean for a signed photo, please include an additional $150). Put the photo on your refrigerator to remind you of other peoples' suffering.

HOW WILL HE KNOW I'M HELPING?

Your MLB player will be told that he has a SPECIAL FRIEND who just wants to help in a time of need. Although the player won't know your name, he will be able to make collect calls to your home via a special operator in case additional funds are needed for unforeseen expenses.

YES, I WANT TO HELP!

I would like to sponsor a striking MLB player. My preference is checked below:
>[ ] Infielder
>[ ] Outfielder
>[ ] Starting Pitcher
>[ ] Ace Pitcher
>[ ] Entire team (Please call our 900 number to ask for the cost of a specific team - $10 per minute)
>[] Alex Rodriguez (Higher cost: $60,000 per day)

Please charge the account listed below $694.50 per day for the player for the duration of the strike. Please send me a picture of the player I have sponsored, along with an Alex Rodriguez 2001 Income Statement and my very own Donald Fehr MLB Players Union pin to wear proudly on my hat (include $80 for hat).

>Your Name: _______________________
>Telephone Number: ____________________
>Account Number: _____________________
>Exp.Date:_______
>[ ] MasterCard [ ] Visa [ ] American Express [ ] Discover
>Signature: _______________________
>Alternate card (when the primary card exceeds its credit limit):
>Account Number: _____________________Exp.Date:_______
>[ ] MasterCard [ ] Visa [ ] American Express [ ] Discover
>Signature: _______________________

Mail completed form to MLB Players Union or call 1-900-F***-THE-FANS now to enroll by phone ($10 per minute).

Disclaimer: Sponsors are not permitted to contact the player they have sponsored, either in person or by other means including, but not limited to, telephone calls, letters, e-mail, or third parties. Contributions are not tax-deductible.

[nicholmere]

Originally posted by zachborman
Subject: Please help the unfortunate

...

The basketball version did not offer a hat. The baseball is obviously worth more

[nicholmere]

TRAVIS TRITT LYRICS

Here's A Quarter (Call Someone Who Cares)
(Travis Tritt)

You say you were wrong to ever leave me alone
You're sorry, you're lonesome, and scared
And you say you'd be happy if you could just come back home
Well, here's a quarter, call someone who cares

hear it here on his web site.

[poseidon]

Originally posted by zachborman
Subject: Please help the unfortunate

Since September 11, 2001, Americans have come together as never before in our generation. We have banded together to overcome tremendous adversity. We have weathered direct attacks on our own soil, wars overseas, corporate scandal, layoffs, unemployment, stock price plunges, droughts, fires, and a myriad of economic and physical disasters both great and small.

But now, we must come together once again to overcome our greatest challenge yet.

Hundreds of Major League Baseball players in our very own nation are living at, just below, or in most cases far above the seven-figure salary level. And as if that weren't bad enough they could be deprived of their life-giving pay for several months, possibly longer, as a result of the upcoming strike situation.

But you can help!

For only $20,835 a month, about $694.50 a day (that's less than the cost of a large screen projection TV) you can help a MLB player remain economically viable during his time of need. This contribution by no means solves the problem as it barely covers the annual minimum salary, but it's a start, and every little bit will help!

Although $700 may not seem like a lot of money to you, to a baseball player it could mean the difference between spending the strike golfing in Florida or on a Mediterranean cruise. For you, seven hundred dollars is nothing more than a month's rent, half a mortgage payment, two unemployment checks, or a month of medical insurance with COBRA, but to a baseball player, $700 will partially replace his daily salary.

Your commitment of less than $700 a day will enable a player to buy that home entertainment center, trade in the year-old Lexus for a new Ferrari, or enjoy a weekend in Rio.

HOW WILL I KNOW I'M HELPING?

Each month, you will receive a complete financial report on the player you sponsor. Detailed information about his stocks, bonds, 401(k), real estate, and other investment holdings will be mailed to your home. Plus, upon signing up for this program, you will receive an unsigned photo of the player lounging during the strike on a beach somewhere in the Caribbean for a signed photo, please include an additional $150). Put the photo on your refrigerator to remind you of other peoples' suffering.

HOW WILL HE KNOW I'M HELPING?

Your MLB player will be told that he has a SPECIAL FRIEND who just wants to help in a time of need. Although the player won't know your name, he will be able to make collect calls to your home via a special operator in case additional funds are needed for unforeseen expenses.

YES, I WANT TO HELP!

I would like to sponsor a striking MLB player. My preference is checked below:
>[ ] Infielder
>[ ] Outfielder
>[ ] Starting Pitcher
>[ ] Ace Pitcher
>[ ] Entire team (Please call our 900 number to ask for the cost of a specific team - $10 per minute)
>[] Alex Rodriguez (Higher cost: $60,000 per day)

Please charge the account listed below $694.50 per day for the player for the duration of the strike. Please send me a picture of the player I have sponsored, along with an Alex Rodriguez 2001 Income Statement and my very own Donald Fehr MLB Players Union pin to wear proudly on my hat (include $80 for hat).

>Your Name: _______________________
>Telephone Number: ____________________
>Account Number: _____________________
>Exp.Date:_______
>[ ] MasterCard [ ] Visa [ ] American Express [ ] Discover
>Signature: _______________________
>Alternate card (when the primary card exceeds its credit limit):
>Account Number: _____________________Exp.Date:_______
>[ ] MasterCard [ ] Visa [ ] American Express [ ] Discover
>Signature: _______________________

Mail completed form to MLB Players Union or call 1-900-F***-THE-FANS now to enroll by phone ($10 per minute).

Disclaimer: Sponsors are not permitted to contact the player they have sponsored, either in person or by other means including, but not limited to, telephone calls, letters, e-mail, or third parties. Contributions are not tax-deductible.

And just how much of that money will be put towards Sally Struthers' mid-afternoon snack?