What do you call your MIL?

**Helen_B**[$] · #1 06-26-2008, 03:37 PM

No, no, I mean in what manner do you address her? Mom, mother, mama, her first name, Mrs. Lastname, a nickname, hey you, what? Just curious, since we're adding another DIL to the family.

**mjfrombuffalo**[$] · #2 06-26-2008, 03:38 PM

Her first name. But that's what Hubby has always called her too.

**thinkerlady**[$] · #3 06-26-2008, 03:55 PM

I always called my mother in law Mom. She was like a mother to me. However, my sister in law called her by her first name, but that is my sister in law.

**mjfrombuffalo**[$] · #4 06-26-2008, 03:59 PM

I should add I always call her either "Mom" or her first name to her face. There may be times when I call her other things, but hopefully she'll never know about that.

**thinkerlady**[$] · #5 06-26-2008, 04:04 PM

Funny, my mother in law has been gone for a year now. I remember when hubby and I were just engaged, and it was Christmas time, and the subject came up about what to call her. She went around the table to all her "in-laws" and in-laws to be (me) and told us what she wanted us to call her!!! From that day on I called her Mom--I would have anyway, but it was at her request!!

**mtomm**[$] · #6 06-26-2008, 04:10 PM

*emeleel* · #7 06-26-2008, 04:28 PM

First name here. My own mother would probably have a cow if I called anyone else Mom.

**jgibson2**[$] · #8 06-26-2008, 04:35 PM

We need to get this settled here. I married an orphan, so no dilemma for me, but my future DIL still doesn't know what she wants to call me. I hope I've made it clear that anything reasonably polite is OK with me.

**lynnzop**[$] · #9 06-26-2008, 05:49 PM

I would expect my first name or Your Highness

When my MIL was alive, I called her by her first name. I would never feel comfortable calling anyone else but my mom "Mom" (except as a joke

)

**Prepoia**[$] · #10 06-26-2008, 05:58 PM

I called my in-laws "mom" and "dad". At first it bothered my parents but as much as I loved my in-laws (and I did) when I called them that it was like their name not really Mom and Dad.

**amykhar** · #11 06-26-2008, 07:13 PM

I'm totally lame. I never called mine anything. When speaking of her, it was always Bob's mom or your mom if speaking to Bob. But, I never called her by name when we spoke.

**jgibson2**[$] · #12 06-26-2008, 07:51 PM

Quote:

amykhar said

I'm totally lame. I never called mine anything. When speaking of her, it was always Bob's mom or your mom if speaking to Bob. But, I never called her by name when we spoke.

I'm afraid that's where I'm headed with my future DIL if she doesn't call me SOMETHING soon. Wedding in August.

**mjfrombuffalo**[$] · #13 06-26-2008, 08:03 PM

Judy, why don't you suggest to her what you want to be called?

The little old lady I drive to church on Sundays loved it when her daughter-in-law called her Mom. Then they had a falling-out during a visit and my little old lady was quick to notice how her DIL said "I got your mother to the airport, we're waiting for the plane" when she came back home. The switch from "Mom" to "your mother" broke my little old lady's heart.

**theworm**[$] · #14 06-26-2008, 08:27 PM

It's a family site so I can't say, but to her face I call her by her first name.

jenninca · #15 06-26-2008, 10:55 PM

Usually her first name. Although now that I have kids, I am using "GG" (her grandma name) more often.

*emeleel* · #16 06-26-2008, 11:04 PM

Ah, true that. "Nana" works just fine for MIL, too.

Magick1 · #17 06-27-2008, 12:16 AM

I usually call her by her first name, but lately, we just say Grandma. She LOVES it when I call her that!

**jgibson2**[$] · #18 06-27-2008, 12:36 AM

My husband calls my parents grandma and grandpa when he talks about them, and mom and dad when he talks to them. The grandma and grandpa thing bugs me, but not them. I don't know how I'll feel about being called that once grandchildren are involved.

MJ,
I want her to be comfortable with whatever she calls me, but I really will have to sit down with her to find out what that is. Maybe I could start asking what her (very few) married friends call their MILs. I've been told I'm much cooler than her mom, meaning more laid back, but I always tell her that's because I'm not responsible for her in the same way that her mom is.

**Helen_B**[$] · #19 06-27-2008, 03:32 AM

I'm just going to ask my DIL to call me Mom. If that's a problem because it's the same as what she calls HER mother, we'll think of something. She is a real sweetie, and yes, I can be more laid back with her for the same reason, Judy. I didn't bring her up, and I'm not in charge of her.

**thinkerlady**[$] · #20 06-27-2008, 09:31 AM

You know, some of it has to do with the son (husband). I remember talking about this with my husband, and he told me "just" call her mom. Now he calls my parents mom and pop--his dad had died shortly before we got engaged, and he couldn't call anyone else dad. It has worked for us.

MiracleMax · #21 06-27-2008, 10:23 AM

Quote:

lynnzop said

I would expect my first name or Your Highness

When my MIL was alive, I called her by her first name. I would never feel comfortable calling anyone else but my mom "Mom" (except as a joke

)

I'll be sure to let Nick know!

I usually call Nick's by her first name if I'm talking to her, but other than that it's always "your mom" or "Nick's mom," depending on who I'm talking to.

**theworm**[$] · #22 06-27-2008, 11:23 AM

Quote:

MiracleMax said

I'll be sure to let Nick know!

I usually call Nick's by her first name if I'm talking to her, but other than that it's always "your mom" or "Nick's mom," depending on who I'm talking to.

um..... Bree....... are you trying to tell us something?

MiracleMax · #23 06-27-2008, 11:32 AM

Quote:

theworm said

um..... Bree....... are you trying to tell us something?

Well...