 The Tell Tale Cat With the Hat Comes Back | |
While rifling through storage boxes the other day, I came upon a little goodie saved from Middle School. Seems that in either 7th of 8th grade, our English teacher had us all write "modern" versions of classic Mother Goose ryhmes, children's stories, etc. She then copied them all off so that we each got a copy and made our own books out of all the poems and stories. Most of these re-written stories are, as you can imagine, quite dreadful, even my own. But I did come upon one adorable gem which I gleefully share with you, mistakes and all:
The Tell Tale Cat With the Hat Comes Back
by Edgar Allen Zuess
Once upon a midnight that was very deary,
While I moped 'round the house really weak and weary
In other words my attitude was anything by cheery.
Came the faintest rapping outside my chamber door.
There was indeed a tapping; someone's there for sure.
"Darnit! I was napping. Be gone, and tap no more."
My visitor told me that he's rather stay
And keep on tip-a-tapping 'cause he had all day.
Then I realized there was no way that he would go away.
That was the fifth time today my ears had heard that
He just kept on knocking. Wham! Bam! Rat-a-tat!
He'd come back to harrass me; that darn cat with the hat.
I had to think quick 'cause my patience wore thin.
"All right. All right. I give. Come in cat, you win."
If my scheme went as planned, the cat was as good as done in!
"I know some fun games we could play," said the cat. "I know
some neat tricks," said the cat with the hat.
Blah, Blah, Blab, Blab, I'd heard it before;
This was the fifth time I had heard all that.
"But first I must get my new whirly-ma-jig;
Just wait'll you see it, you will flip your wig.
It's out on the porch, see 'cause my whirly-ma-jig's big."
This was my chance. "Hold It" You cat, you cat with the hat.
To get your thing there, you must pass my bat."
He called my bluff. One swing, a whump! He went down, that was that.
Now what would I do with this guy on my floor?
Could I see him to a Chinese restauranteur?
Would he want this cat? "Nah...I'll stuff him under the floor."
I bent back some boards. A few: two, three or four.
I dumped the cat down where he'd bug me no more.
When I was done, I put the boards back where they had been before.
That's when I heard it. It was hardly that loud.
But it sounded as if a cat had meowed.
Could it be he? No way! Not he! The cat with the hat was now wearing a shroud.
I heard it again and again after that.
He came back to haunt me! He came back, the rat!
"Meow, meow, meow, meow," said the cat.
It went on for hours. "Please stop, I implore. Stop that meowing.
I can stand it no more."
He meowed once again, so I tore 'cross the room and tore up the floor.
The cat stood straight up; Yes, 'twas him that I saw.
"How is it that you have lived since my bat hit your jaw?"
The rubbed his head turned and then said:
Quoth the cat - "Eight lives more!"
by Scott Sloan and Ricky Hilliard
__________________ Melanie
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When Poe ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.
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