Phone rings.

Caller: "Hi there, can I speak to the person in charge of organizing your move?"

Receptionist: "We're not moving."

Caller: "OK, but can I tell you about our specials? We are offering moving specials on trucks and boxes..."

Receptionist: *click*

(seriously... if we're not moving, why the pitch? Do they think if we listen to them talk about their specials, we're going to say "Oh wow, that's too good to pass up, schedule us to move on Jan 31!" and then go out and find a new location to move to?)

Um... I was bad today... I gave everyone in our waiting room a laugh

Coworker: email it to me
Me (standing on the patient side of the front desk counter): What's your email (whips out phone).
Coworker: It's cookie...@aol.com
Me: Oops... I just typed cokkie...
Me: (realizing I just pronounced "cock" in front of the waitingroom) Sorry... I didn't even think I was saying a bad word, just a funny word

it would have sounded like the legitimate English word "cocky," so I wouldn't worry too much about it.
One time my friend told a story about catching her roommate in my friend's bed (with company), not knowing that her real estate clients were sitting in the next room (door open). She didn't get that listing, needless to say.

On the subject of Glen Beck:

Woman: I don't think he's even an American. What is he?
Man: A conservative.

Admin Asst to me just now: "Want to watch me try to do a three-way video?"

:faint:

Could have been worse. She could have asked you to join her.

New videoconference technology, first attempt at three sites. But boy, it was funny to hear her say that.

LOL!

I heard something yesterday on TV. One of the news stations has a daily "cute" feature where they show pictures of babies on their first birthday and say something that the parents sent in about the kid (we did it with Jeremy, I still have it on VHS).

"Here's little *Bobby Brown*, who turned one today. Bobby loves his dog Misty, and likes to play with himself outside."

Yesterday a cubicle neighbor asked "How do you spell 'fiance'?"

Another neighbor responded: "B-E-Y-O-N-C-E."

"FIANCE????"

"Yeah. B-E-Y-O-N-C-E!"

Note: due to our wiring, when we brew coffee in the conference room, everything in my colleague's office shuts off - but only if she's running her space heater.


Coworker: Well I can tell you’re brewing coffee, my office shut off
MJ: You have your heater on? It’s August! … Hey, weren’t you there when I said I was going to make coffee?
Coworker: Yes but it didn’t compute.
[circuit breaker switch reset]
MJ: Don’t turn your heater back on just yet, the coffee is still brewing.
Coworker: Oh, that went off too? I didn’t realize they were on the same switch.

Three women are coming out of the office at the same time as I was tonite. They work for that big online brokerage company. They were all laughing while they shouted across the parking lot....

"Tomorrow I'm wearing pants."
"hahahaha Tomorrow, I'M wearing full coverage panties."
"Maybe we should just tell someone that changing clothes in her cubical is NOT cool."

LOL

Not overheard per ce... Boss is coming to LI today. I gave him the train schedule and circled in red the time for the train he needed to take, the time it would arrive at his destination station, and the times for the two likely return trains. Then, thinking it was overkill but doing it anyway, I put post-it notes on the two sections saying "To NY" and "To LI."

His assistant emailed me that he's left for his train but before he did, he showed her the schedule and asked her to explain it to him. Maybe I needed to draw pictures

The Peter Principle lives!